I’ve been feeding the birds since I moved here. I mostly get chickadees, mourning doves and Stellar’s Jays. Last week, I was driving and I saw a Stellar’s in the road-right in the double yellow line in the center, actually. I made a u turn, because I thought it was alive. It wasn’t. I grabbed some napkins, and picked up it’s limp body, so light and beautiful. It’s neck was broken. Since I was 30 feet from a cemetery, I moved it there- I figured if I left it in the street, whatever beast came to feast on it would also be in danger of getting hit by a car.
Later that evening, as the Jays gathered in the front yard to eat- I wondered if they might be trying to say something- but then figuring they only came for the food, I let it go.
Last night I dreamt that I was working at an old job. The business is now closed, and I live 500 miles away from it- so I don’t fear for my life at the moment. But I was working there, and I was shot and killed. Only, I didn’t know I was dead, so I went about the rest of my day- visiting my family, feeding my pets. When it was brought to my attention that I was in fact, dead, and needed to go where dead people go- back in the real world, a Stellar’s Jay flapped against my window- waking me up.
My bed is beneath the window, and I saw him sit on the shade outside then *do it again* on purpose. Then he came through the crack in the window, flew around the room counter-clockwise three times, landed on the indoor ledge, and flew back out.
*So the bird stopped my dream-walking self from going to where dead people go.*
Thanks? I’m not sure if it would have been so bad to visit, but perhaps hard to get out. I’ve often heard that people don’t/can’t/shouldn’t dream their own death- that the ego will wake them up because it can’t face the death- but apparently that isn’t so. I was definitely killed, even if I was confused about it.
* So what’s with the Stellar’s Jay?*
“I am fortitude. rebirth, and life after death. No, everything is not okay and you have died, but I will make you pick up your bones and show you how to build a new life.”
*Well, thank Gods you’re here, Stellar- because I was dead.*
*Seems a good companion for this part of my process (even if I don’t quite grasp what I’m processing).
“Stellar’s Jay teaches lessons of adaptation to any situations and learning quickly with a high intelligence. He gives access to memories long forgotten and shows how to assimilate them into awareness. He demonstrates risk taking, seizing opportunities and discovering new avenues for exploration. He will show the power of intelligence and fortitude balanced with discreet silence and utmost patience in timing. Bold and inquisitive Stellar’s Jay has a penchant for investigating, adapting and learning new ideas and concepts. His creative intelligence uncovers sacred interconnections with all things. Mental growth aids spiritual growth. The energy centers of the head may become activated due to the increase of new spiritual knowledge. Pay attention to dream time as traveling, journeying and body sensations which will give new insights. Connect with Mother Earth. Stellar’s Jay also demonstrates that anything of value, spiritual growth and relationships takes work. It is daily activation of internal resources, let Stellar’s Jay show how it is done. Knowledge is collected so future wisdom comes to light. Is it time to set new goals? Envision it and pick the pieces into small ones to completion. He supports strong communication abilities often with sharp jabs. Exercise judgment, care, and diplomacy. The opposite may be true as well. Is it time to be forthright to finally “crack” the issue open? Stellar’s Jay shows that a balanced diet is needed.”
Interesting times- regardless.